Top 10 We show LOTS of Eastside homes. LOTS! We're with your Buyers, Mr. and Mrs. Seller. We see what they see and hear what they say to us afterward. Here's our "Letterman" style Top 10 Most Offensive Buyer Turn Offs list.
10. The street jungle (or is there a house behind the shrubs???) -- If we need a machete to get to your front door, your house automatically becomes unkempt in the mind of the Buyer. And what about your weed yard? Not to mention your kids trikes and bikes lying all over. If you're too busy, hire someone to take care of your front yard. You'll make more money and have a quicker sale.
9. The nasty front door -- Sure your door is de-laminating and the paint is peeling, but it still works! And what about your worn, rusty door knob. The best one of all is your ill-working lock that makes it a crap shoot to see if we can really enter!
8. The filthy floor with your sign "Please remove your shoes." Are you kidding me? Sometimes I feel like I have to wash my shoes! If your carpet has the look that your kids and pets eat, drink and sleep on it (and worse). Spend the $$ to have it cleaned and stretched! By the way, save your carpet allowance. If carpets need to be replaced, replace them. Buyer's pick the house that looks the nicest.
7. So you're an interior designer -- and you love your royal purple walls in your living room! Trouble is your Buyer owns an expensive olive green sofa and love seat. OUCH! OK, we'll go down the street to buy the new construction that's painted in nice neutral tones. Why should my Buyer have to paint your walls, anyway?
6. Way toooooo much stuff -- The last time I wanted to juke and weave was when I played high school football. Maneuvering around the 12 antiques and 3 couches you have in your living room (because you just HAD to have them) are hard on the hip bones. Put them in storage so we can see your house, not your stuff!
5. Kujo -- You love your dog, but he looks like Kujo to my fearful Buyer. Can't wait to get out fast enough. Or she won't even go in!
4. Dirty bathrooms -- If there's a hint of body hair lying about--GROSS! Did you know there are soap scum cleaners for the shower door and tub? And how about the moldy caulking? Flushing and cleaning toilets is a good thing when selling your house. And for goodness sake, pick up your underwear!
3. Selling us your home -- Yes, you know your home. Do you really think we're interested in the shelf you put in your pantry 10 years ago? We really do have eyes and can see the obvious. Besides, how can my Buyer's fall in love and bond with your house when they can't discuss where to put their furniture?
2. Phew! -- I know, you're a cigarette smoke blowin', deep fat frying, pet loving, mold growing son of a gun. But you have a great idea! You'll just spread plug in air fresheners around. You just gave me and my Buyer an instant headache. If it smells, it wont sell.
1. And the number one most obnoxious Buyer turn off is..... Your overpriced house. Yes, you're attached to your house. You've raised your 6 children there and are proud of the redecorating you did 15 years ago. You want to maximize your investment. So do the Buyer's. They'll find the best value, believe me!
This is the "truf" (truth) with an "f." That's a distinction we don't give to many blog posts. Congrats on joining the elite club...at least according to Real Opinionated.
Posted by: Jonathan Greene | March 26, 2007 at 09:17 PM
Thank you Jonathan.
If it were a TOP 11 list, I would have included the "Saturday morning showing after the Friday night party."
Posted by: Greg Perry | March 27, 2007 at 07:49 AM